rusty was in my dreams last night. chasing me and i fell in mud and then he kept walking looking for his pants. my dreams i fucking hate them. sdflkjdsjfdsjk NEVER FORGET FUCKING DDFDSFJDSFJJKJDSJFKLSDJFKLSDFJ NO!!!!!!!
so this is how i became emotionally scarred for life. i was at maty's tipped house. maybe its drinking buddies with its backyard senor sex. you never know. after a refreshing nights sleep i woke up and decided to walk out into the living room to talk to thomas. i wanted to talk to him about i dont know but i decided that dammit i was goign to talk to thomas. then i do the normal walk out of the room wing a michael jackson dance move around the corner, pretend im super cool imagine myself famous and rich. when i got my eyes straight i saw a naked person standing next to thomas who was on the computer. completly fucking naked talking to thomas about bingo. so i fucking lunge back into matys room and push her out the the bedroom door to see what i just saw. make sure i wasnt just hallucinating. when she saw she shoulder slammed be back into the room and slammed the door. naked person standing next to thomas in the living room talking to thomas about bingo. just to get things straight i didnt know this guy even lived in the camper in matys backyard. i didnt even know she had a backyard or a camper in the backyard. so were in matys room dying from laughter. we finally come out later and ask thomas what the fuck was going on and he starts telling us a story about rusty luring him into his room to show him a bottle of 15 dollar hair conditioner. thomas must be semi blind. the naked guy in his room standing straddle legged over a pile of dirty clothes holding a bottle of hair conditioner. this would have sent me to the mental hospital. i mean adfudkfjsdakfdkj NOT IN MY ROOM. so me and maty are like fuck we have to leave. its essential. so as were leaving i see rusty crusing around the side of the house topless and i look away. i just cant fathom how maty must feel . i mean if there was a naked drunk guy living in a camper in my backyard who strutted around my house naked i would be a little freaked out.
then later he was stalking us while we were trying to scurry around the outside of the house looking for some water turn off valve. another story another day. and he cornered us near the truck to give us a talk about how he was sorry about what happened. but the strange part of the conversation was that he didnt really think it was weird to be standing in matys living room naked talking to thomas about bingo. honestly he was like i heard you two laughing and im sorry but thats all i got. you know i wish i had more but im stuck with this. at this point i had to walk away because i thought i was going to die from trying not to laugh. this guy. im fascinated in a morbid way. he thought we were laughing at his small dick when we were laughing because he was in the living room naked talking to thomas about bingo. i mean you just dont see things like that everyday.
i cant even think of this clearly enough to write about it. its just something if i was normal i hope would never happen again but fuck it was funny as hell. im kind of jealous of maty that she gets to live with this fine speciman. i would pay for someone like that to live in my backyard. this guy is simply breathtaking. he is a must see. 5 stars. a perfect 10.
i guess this is matys way of getting back at me because i had herpes and she didnt.